Incomplete is a bad thing.

So I was idling my time away online as usual.I logged into Blogger as per routine,and accidentally navigated to the drafts section of the posts.Intriguing titles and dangling phrases led me to take a closer look,and I unwittingly stole a few glances at the past me.

I found a couple of unfinished poems.They weren't anything the world would miss(or even things I would miss for that matter,...naah!I'd be lying if I said that.I am narcissistic enough to miss my own verse,anyway,that's quite besides the point,isn't it?).I really couldn't tell what I was trying to say through the poems though.Somewhere,I think I was on the verge of getting hold of the soul of the poem.With sweet irony though,that beginning brought with it the end.Poof.Draft over.

I also observed a gradual change in my writing style.My older posts were more formal sounding,with attention to grammar,attempts to pay attention to punctuation,with proper and non silly sounding words.With time,I have begun to shy away from attempting poetry,and have stuck to writing post after post about my mundane life sparing the occasional bursts into melancholy,because I'm ashamed to rhyme,afraid to break out,and too busy to spare a few minutes for pondering.

I wonder if micro blogging sites like Twitter, and Facebook updates,have anything to do with my.....impatience.No other word for it.I try to return to my old self,at least when it comes to thought patterns,but it's impossible.That was me then.This is me now.I can't really seek out a past identity of mine and hide beneath it when I'm definitely not the same person underneath anymore.It would be like effectively making null and void whatever's happened to me in the last few months,like erasing a sizeable chunk of my experiences in life.And that's not what I intend to do.

The second best thing I can think of then,is to have a record of what I was like earlier,so that I can look back at some old memories and paint a picture of things as they used to be.Then,in bitter times,I can live on a bit of borrowed sentiment from the past.And that's where old post come in.To me,they are the key to unlocking my younger self.

That's why the sight of unfinished drafts frustrate me.The leave me wondering about what exactly I was thinking then.Sometimes,I remember the circumstances in which I penned a draft,but I do not remember my reactions to that situation.How unfair is that?!

That's why I 'm going to take this moment to remind you all to finish your thoughts.At least whilst you're on Blogger.You might not feel like writing just then,but endeavor to make your thoughts a little more lucid,so you can always come back to it later.Don't deceive yourself :your mind isn't an impenetrable bank,time gets through to everything.You eventually will forget.You might lose a moment of your life in the sense that you will not be able to remember what that moment revolved around.

Sorry if I sound half crazed,but I just want to impress upon you that your identity is the most important thing you can ever own,and so, a ManU vs. Arsenal showdown definitely does not justify leaving your thoughts unfinished.

I'll talk more when I'm not being strange rambling girl (which is what many of you must have begun to call me in your head,I'm sure).

'K bye!

Not your typical musical night

My semester has come to an end.You know what that means--->end semester exams.Sob!Anyway,I was about to tell you that I have my linear algebra paper tomorrow and that I began preparations in earnest last night,hoping to appease the rather stuck up gods that control the fates of all victims of mathematics.

Despite the honorable intentions,I fared miserably in my attempt to study.Deciding music would help clear my mind,I fetched my CD player and plugged it in(no,I do not like listening to music on a pod or mp3 or any other device which requires me to use headphones,earphones or anything of the like).I got further pissed when I couldn't locate my CD collection.Going with the desperation the hour demanded,I hit play,resigning myself to listening to whatever was in the blasted thing.

Imagine my pleasant surprise when some lovely Hindustani music notes filled the air!Frankly,I don't listen to much classical music myself.That's not to say that I don;t enjoy it,it's just not my first choice.The music was slow.Non distracting.It remained in the background.Mightily please,I went about my cramming.Every now and then however,I couldn't help but devote my attention completely to the music.There was some soulful raag alaap before every song.I particularly enjoyed the one set to the raaga Hamsadhwani. Some of you Carnatic music enthusiasts may know of the raaga Kaanada,it's my favourite,coz it inherently seems like a twang of melancholy.Last night,I discovered my second favourite--Bhoop. :) I couldn't help but digress,and spent some happy moments humming along with the CD.

It's true what they say,isn't it,about classaical music being one of the purest forms of music?My mother says that is among the few forms of music that can manage to pull anyone away from what they're doing(not that my case counts,coz almost anything manages to pull me away from math...still).

The tunes;they rose,they fell,they meandered,and they never failed to amaze.Aw shucks,I'm rambling here.I wouldn't know.

What I do know is that last evening,I got some good studying done.This might even be the first time in living memory that I enjoyed algebra,and that definitely is something to celebrate!

Alright,I've got some nasty exams lined up for me.Till later,then. :)

Q&A

Q.How foolish it is to want something very badly and then push it away,not knowing whether it would ever be in your reach again?
A.Very foolish.
Thunk.Thunk.That's me whacking meself on the head (like that's going to help) . :

Masquerade

I am never thankful for a few moments of silence.Strangely,that morning was one of consequence.

Morose and unseeing eyes rode up and down the black roads,staring,as if to wrangle answers to everyday sorrows out of the black tar.

Pause.Rewind.They wound back to a puddle on which floated a fleet of a most curious sort.

A pretty and tattered shoe with rhinestone edges headed this parade.

It had laced the delicate feet of the bar dancer last night,I whimsically imagined.She must have run away in the pitch of the night.Do not interrupt and ask me to fathom why she ran,not when what we do in most of our spare time is run away from realities.

Not keen to return to the mundane bus stop,I moved on to the next oddity in the puddle.

A tie stuffed into a cola can.

I could almost see the snot faced kid that had celebrated his afternoon after school with the school boyish gesture of discarding his tie.Not having found a suitable dispenser,the kid had decided to stuff the tie into the nearest object in sight.

Who said kids weren't resourceful?

Masquerading third in the puddle was a dirty scrap of paper.

A page out of a phone book,yet another slice of someone else's life.

10 digits repeated themselves over and over again;keys to a stranger's obsession,maybe that of a lovestruck lad's ,nursing his first heartbreak.

His lady had refused to answer his call,he'd vented his desperation and tossed the scrap away after overcoming it.

I laughed a little sadly at this boy's (?) plight,and then decided to make things better.After all,stories need happy endings,don't they?
Yes,our boy must have bumped into our running bar dancer wearing one pretty rhinestone shoe,and the two would have shared coffee and a good laugh over the craziness of their encounter.

Sighing wistfully,I shut the book that lay open on my lap.

Later,Mr.Maupassant.

I had other stories to know of.

My eyes left the queer masquerade on the eventful puddle.Once again,they moved up and down the black roads,only this time they weren't wrangling the tar for answers to everyday sorrows.

It was storytime,yes indeedy.

Shauk hai!

These are the lyrics to one of the most soulful songs I have ever heard.It's a song called Shauk hai (I desire) from the movie Guru.The music has been composed by Rahmanji and sung by Soumya Raoh.

The song is sung by a girl who is on the verge of death.As she leaves,she sings of the simple things of life which she loved and cherished.

The icy clouds,the earthy silence of the night,the brilliance of light,amlas,dewdrops,and the craze that is emotion.

A wave of regret and pain stealthily washes over the listener.Yet,there is not much lament,only simple beauty.
Wanted to share it with you all (if you aren't familiar with it already) ...:)

Here goes.



Raat ka shauk hai
Raat ki saundhi si khamoshi ka shauk hai
Subah ki roshni ,bezubaan subahon ki aur gungunati
Roshni ka shauk hai, ho.... shauk hai.

San sani naawlon ka
Ishq ke banwlon ka
San sani naawle
Ishq ke baanwle
Barf se khelte badolon ka ...shauk hai!

Kaash ye zindagi khel hi khel mein kho gayi hoti.
Raat ka shauk hai
neend ki goliyon ka,
khwab ke loriyon ka,
Neend ki goliyan ,khwab ke loriyan

Bezubaan aus ki boliyon ka...Shauk hai

Kaash ye zindagi binkahe binsune so gayi hoti

Subah ki roshni
Bezubaan subahon ki aur gungunati
Roshni ka ....
Shauk hai, shauk hai...

Tagged :The ABCs of me

Hello all!
I tagged myself upon reading this particularly delightful tag on Misty Rhythm's blog.
So,without ado,here's presenting-the ABCs of me.

The rules of this tag are :
1. Link the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Share the ABCs of you.
4. Tag 3 people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.

A- Available/Single : Very much single,but...not available.No further questions.

B- Best Friend : Sakshi and Aks...my jaans! :)

C- Cake/Pie : Cake!I don't fancy them crusty pies with weird sticky syrup on the top much. Gimme a handful of sinfully rich chocolate pastry,and I'll be a happy gal!

D- Do you want anything right now? Hmm...you don't look like a genie,but I'll tell you anyway. A burger and fries from McD.I haven't had lunch yet,no one's home,I'm too lazy to fix something myself,and I'm too lazy to move my ass off this couch.

E-Essential item you use every day ? My glasses.The rims are a pretty icicle blue and they convince me to stay away from contact lenses.

F -Freedom to me is ? To be able to live life the way I want to ,without having to tread on anyone's toes.

G- Giggle/Laugh ? I've always wanted to produce a feminine,lilting giggle,but my chords resonate with rather unladylike bursts of laughter and snorts .Hmph!I don't like G so much anymore.

H- Heart/Brain ?Heart! :) Jo bhi ho,dil se ho!

I - Indulgence/Addiction : Brownies,the Web,and solo karaoke sessions (there's a reason they're solo :D :P)

J- July or July? Me not likes July much.It always signals the end of the holidays ,and the start of early mornings. :(

K- Kids and their names ? Whaaa...? Have nevvver thought about that!Oh...err..emm...ok let's just be embarrassingly straightforward about this.
Aryan, if it's a boy,and Tara,if it's a girl. *turns crimson

L- Life is...?Life can be an adventure,a fairytale,a horror flick,or a gamut of all these.It can be anything you make it out to be.It's outrageously unpredictable,uncontrollable and thrilling.And that's what makes it an addiction.Whoa!!!I dunno what about this word reduces tough cookies to pools of poetic phrases.

M-Mistakes - Made plenty.Moving out of Hyderabad was the biggest one.There's no point on analyzing them over and over again though,nobody's perfect eh? (and nobody's me!! lol...yea,the kindergarten kid in me is very much dominant.Hah!)

N-Number of siblings ?N for none.Do my (once beloved)dolls count?

O -One thing I hate to accept ?The fact that you can't change the past.That and the concept of low cal.(BLEH!)


P -Pictures/Reality? Pictures.I'm a sentimental fool most of the time;besides, reality can wait. :)

Q -Quote for today? "Just do it."

R -Reason my brain is working these days : Oh,this is news to me! :p

S -Season ? Winter.I think reading too many Enid Blytons as a kid may have brought about this choice,but I honestly,believe winter is a season of pure beauty.The chill,the food,the celebration...,it's all good!

T- Tag 3 people ? Ok,I tag Devika,Sayesha and ,,,you!Now go do this tag,sucker!!!;)

U-Unknown fact about me ? I act like rude comments and names don't affect me at all,but they do.A lot. Also,I own a hell lot of "lucky" possessions,and woe betide you if you happen to lose one of them !

V -Vegetable I don't like ? Beetroot.*sticks tongue out* Why would anyone want to eat something which makes your plate look like it's been given a blood bath (beetroot lovers,sorry!)

W -Worst habit ?I forget where I put things very easily.It's gotten me into cartloads of trouble,and I still can't seem to stop.

X- X-rays you've had? Enough x rays to give your bedroom some hideous looking wallpaper.

Y -Yes/Yuck ? Yes or yuck to what? This tag?In that case, yes!

Z- Zodiac :One stubborn Taurean.


Now run along,you!Have a nice day :)

coz...Love don't cost a thing

Money can't buy you happiness.Certainly,it can't buy you love either.Still,can you blame all the rich and sad souls for trying?